Family Reunion
by Jaden Grace1
Summary: Cas has a talk with someone he hasn't seen in a long time. Oneshot. We'll say spoilers though Season 7 to be safe. This is my first ever Supernatural fic, so please read and review to let me know how I did! It's mostly dialogue, just to let you know.


Family Reunion

"Castiel."

Cas froze mid-step, his right foot dangling in the air.

_It can't be, _he thought as he slowly lowered his foot to the cold, autumn ground. _It's…impossible. _

Cas stood like a statue in the middle of the park, his mouth slightly open, trying to process what was happening. He had instantly recognized the voice, the voice deep as the darkest depths of the ocean and warm as the slight, soothing breeze of summer. The voice that had created worlds and wonders as brilliant as the galaxies and yet had still had the softness to explain to a child the importance of a single beetle…

Barely above a whisper, Cas asked, "Father?"

"Yes, Castiel. I am here."

Cas's doubt was gone in an instant and anger crashed over him like giant wave of fury. He whipped around, trenchcoat flapping violently in the chill autumn breeze, and turned his face violenltly towards the sky.

"You are here?! YOU ARE HERE?! Where were you?!" Cas demanded, violently spreading his arms. "Where were you when I needed you, when I needed your guidance?"

"I never left you, Castiel, any of you. I was always there."

Cas was incredulous. "What?! You mean to tell me that you saw everything that was going on, that you heard every single one of my prayers…" Cas paused, looking down at the ground and swallowing, not sure he wanted to hear the answer to his next question. "And you ignored it?"

There was a short pause as Cas waited for an answer.

"Yes."

This pushed Cas over the edge and he was now beyond furious. "I needed you, Father," he screamed. "I needed you! I did so many horrible, awful things trying to figure out what I was supposed to do, what the right thing to do was…" Cas had begun to talk faster and faster, trying to outrun the tears that had begun to gather and the lump that had begun to form in his throat. "I—," Cas tried unsuccessfully to swallow the lump. "I killed, Father." He spat the words out, full of guilt and self-loathing, then took a shuddering breath. "I—, I killed my own brothers." He could no longer hold back the tears. He hung his head in shame and grief, letting the tears stream down his face. His fists were clenched so tightly at his sides that his knuckles were bleached white.

There was another pause.

"I know, Castiel."

Cas looked up in surprise, the tears still rolling down his cheeks. This was not the reaction he had been expecting. "You know?" he repeated.

"Yes, Castiel. I never left, remember?"

Cas was dumbfounded. He asked incredulously, "And you let me do all of these awful, heinous things?"

There was yet another pause, longer this time.

"Yes."

Cas screamed, "WHY?!" forcing all of his rage, fury, pain, guilt, shame, and loathing into that single word. He needed to know, otherwise he feared he might fall apart.

"Because I love you, Castiel."

Cas was too stunned to speak. "Wh— W— I—…" He tried to form words, but he was in so much shock that it had become impossible.

"Let me explain."

There was another short pause.

"Castiel, you might want to take a seat. This could take awhile."

Still in a state of shock, it took a moment for Cas to process what was being said. He then sat down on the fallen leaves with his legs crossed and hands in his lap, his head again heavy with guilt.

"When I first created you, my precious angels, you were the most perfect things I had ever created. You were each unique and beautiful and perfect in your own way. The thing that made you guys special, however, was that you had the extraordinary gift of choice."

Confused, Cas looked up and began to ask, "But-"

"Yes, I know, I'll explain. It would be easier if you saved all of your questions until the end."

Cas slowly nodded his head in consent.

"As I was saying, I had given you angels the gift of free will. Lucifer, as you know, definitely exercised this gift. When I created the humans, I gave them this wonderful gift also. They had the ability to choose me or deny me, to make good decisions and bad decisions, to make right decisions and wrong decisions. And while some made horrible, horrible choices," Cas cringed, "the point was that they were making the decisions. As time went on, I realized that though the humans kept using their gift, my precious angels had lost it, only wanting to decide what I wanted them to decide. They had no other will but mine. I knew that I had to return this wonderful gift to my precious angels, and so Sam and Dean Winchester were born."

Cas immediately perked up at the mention of the Winchesters.

"I waited for them to grow up, and then I 'disappeared', allowing 'Team Free Will' to be born. I wanted Team Free Will to happen, Castiel. Not only for the humans' benefit, but for the angles as well."

Cas was silent. He sat there among the fallen leaves, holding his hands in his lap. After a few moments, new tears began to stream down his face and he buried his face in his hands. He began to rock back and forth, saying "I'm so sorry, Father. I'm so sorry." He sputtered, "I'm so sorry I made all the wrong choices and hurt so many people."

"I know, Castiel, I know."

Still rocking, he blubbered, "If only I had made all the right choices. Then all of my brothers would be alive."

"No, Castiel."

Cas stopped rocking and looked up from his hands. Very confused, he managed a "Huh?"

"First of all, part of the price of the amazing gift of free will is that you will not always make the right choice. In fact, more often than not you will make the wrong ones. You cannot blame yourself for making bad choices, Castiel, it is a part of being able to choose. And second, it was inevitable. Someone was going to make those choices, Castiel. I'm glad it was you."

Cas was again dumbfounded. "But…why?"

"Because, Castiel, you have always had the biggest heart."

"I- I don't understand."

"You were the example, Castiel. You not only showed all of your brothers and sisters that you can make your own choice, but you also showed them that you can make mistakes and still have your heart in the right place."

There was a short pause.

"You've shown them that if you're truly sorry, you can be forgiven."

Cas took a moment to process what his father was telling him. Slowly he asked, "You mean… you mean I'm forgiven?"

"Yes, Castiel, of course. I know how big your heart is and I know how hard you try to do the right thing."

Cas felt as though the weight of the world had been lifted from his shoulders. He was free to stetch his wings and soar. Tears were again falling from his face, but these were tears of joy and relief. He was so emotional, he could barely manage a "Thank you, Father." He took a deep breath. "Thank you."

"You're welcome, Castiel. And know that I love you dearly."

Cas chuckled, sniffling a little. "For a while I wasn't sure… but I know that now. And, Father?"

"Yes, Castiel?"

"What am I supposed to do now?"

Cas could feel the warmth of his father's smile through the chill autumn air.

"That, Castiel, is for you to decide."


End file.
